A Beginner’s Guide to Nature in the Time of Corona

Hello and, again, welcome back to society in the times of nationwide shelter-in-place. Although there has been a number of opinions to the contrary, any discomfort you’ve suffered during that your short detention has been for the public health and not for any darkly nefarious purpose.

As the first inklings of a more recognizable lifestyle are considered by state and federal governments, we know you are as excited as we are at the Department of Human Experience to return to the outside world. But remember… Nature is a place of both excitement and endangerment. It is unsafe to sojourn into the Outside without first observing the following health and safety measures.

Prepare Properly for Your Expedition

The last months may have seen your sense of style regress, with comfortable sweatpants and shorts replacing office chic and khakis. In many cases, you might have become accustomed to the idea of your climate being completely controllable, as it is within the boundary of your four walls.

1. First, check the weather.

Regrettably, the Outside does not fall under your jurisdiction! To that end, we suggest that any journey outside is done only after carefully assessing local weather conditions and outfitting yourself appropriately. As we approach the summer months, there are many regions in the United States where temperatures rise considerably from the levels experienced when the shelter-in-place first went into effect.

Take these changes into account! The sweatshirts of March can and should give way to the polos of June. The bare feet that might have been used to walk to and from the kitchen should be sheathed by shoes or sandals. After all, the concrete paths and asphalt roads of the Outside bear little resemblance to the carpet and hardwood with which so many of us have become accustomed.

It also has been recently brought to our attention that there is a bright thing in the sky. This bright thing, while warm and helpful in revealing your surroundings, can also cause damage to eyes and skin unused to the rigors of the outdoors. Be sure to apply sunscreen and wear suitably stylish pince-nez before taking any extended walks outside. Not only will your protect your vision for all the sights of the Outside, you will continue to avoid membership in the Melanoma Club.

2. Keep a suitable distance from all animals.

There are those who may see a relaxation of shelter-in-place as a sign that the precautions of the early pandemic are now removed in totality.

This is not the case.

As with the times before the pandemic, personal space should be observed at all times. In many cases, this can be achieved by keeping a degree of separation between you and others. If you are unsure of exactly how large a space this may encompass, imagine keeping about three steps between you and any other animal, or about one length of your body lying upon the ground.

(Please note, out of concern for personal cleanliness and hygiene, we do not suggest actually lying on the ground.)

In more sparsely populated areas, such distance may be easily achievable without the necessity of additional safety equipment. For more densely populated regions, however, we understand that keeping this space, especially from other explorers in the Outside, may be difficult. When such matters occur, please continue to observe all proper bio-safety protocols such as mask-wearing or face-covering. While uncomfortable, such coverings are required not only for your safety, but the safety of the other animals inhabiting the Outside with you.

Along the same vein, you may notice that other animals, both two-legged or four, keep their distance from you with more caution than before. Do not be troubled by this; we are all equally lost as we take our first collective steps in this brave new world.

If all else fails, try to keep in mind that they are as afraid of you as you are of them.

3. Observe the instructions of rangers and local environmental officials.

In the last weeks of isolation, there has been plenty of time to hear about the pandemic. Whether through our own scholarship or through absorbed information from media sources, there may be a tendency to believe that our personal investigations into the pandemic mean we are now experts and able to determine the best course forward for ourselves.

Do your best to ignore this impulse. Though the internet and television give us access to so many new avenues of information, we are and will remain largely unaware of the finer points of the pandemic. In the next weeks, as we tentatively inch towards a vague sense of normality, remember that there are limits to the knowledge of pundits.

Enjoying the Outdoors and the Way Forward

We at the Department of Human Experience are heavy proponents of returning to the Outside, as we are aware of the continued psychological and physical benefits that interaction can bring to the everyday American.

Though it may be distasteful, we cannot stress the continued necessity of caution as the pandemic continues to affect the entire nation. It is with this status in mind, then, that we will continue to post additional notes on the proper classification of organisms and interaction with the various pieces of society in the weeks ahead.

Until then, if you should wonder as to whether or not we have returned to pre-pandemic ways of life, we at the USDHE have only one response…